How Did I Get Here? My Story Before Sobriety | LTMD Episode 17
I didn’t wake up one day and say:
“I have a drinking problem.”
I woke up a hundred times telling myself I didn’t.
In Episode 17 of Louder Than My Demons, I tell the story before sobriety — the normalization of drinking, the military culture around alcohol, the warning signs I ignored, and the lies I told myself while my life still looked like it was working.
This episode isn’t about rock bottom.
It’s about the slow erosion that happens before it.
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In this episode:
• My first experiences with drinking
• How alcohol became normalized in my life
• The Marine Corps and drinking culture
• The lies I told myself about control
• Why functioning doesn’t mean healthy
• Songwriting, self-care, and honesty
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🎸 Guitar Tales:
Jeff Angell, Walking Papers, and why the song Already Dead has meant so much to me and my daughter.
🎶 Beyond the Songs:
A performance and breakdown of Already Dead by Walking Papers.
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Louder Than My Demons is a war journal built on the Five S’s of Sobriety — a code for survival.
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⏱ CHAPTERS
00:00 “How did I get here?”
00:40 Intro
01:30 Outlaw Sermon — The lie before the fall
07:30 The Reckoning — My story before sobriety
20:30 Military culture & normalization
28:00 The lie I told myself
32:00 Guitar Tales — Jeff Angell & Walking Papers
38:00 Beyond the Songs — Already Dead
43:00 Field Notes — Songwriting & Self-Care
46:00 Samson preview
47:30 The Reprise
52:00 Final thoughts
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🎙 New episodes every Friday
⚔️ Outlaw Logic every Monday
🔥 Demon Cuts returns this season
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We recover loud.
Louder Than Our Demons.